planned dating.

Mike and I go on a date every Friday or Saturday night.  Dates help me through out the rest of the week.  I love them.  Can't live without them.  People ask me how I manage to go out on dates...I wonder how they can manage to NOT go on a date.

I think that dates are marriage insurance.  They protect your marriage and save you money...in therapy.  We get to talk, have fun, be together without our kids, let our kids know that we love each, keeps me sane, and have fun...oh wait!  I already said have fun.

And it's romantic and exciting and living to have fun!

So our date tonight was the picture above.  I'm going to be fast posting this because well...we're not done having fun tonight.  Mike just took our babysitter home...

We went to a five-and-dime store in town and got some fun (and politically incorrect) games.  It was raining like crazy so we found a newly built strip mall and played undercover of their awning to keep us dry.  We had fun laughing, being silly, and acting like kids.  We played capture the bowling ball pin and used our guns to defend our bowling ball pins (after we had already bowled using every possible silly stance we could think of to throw our balls down the lane...).  We made playdoh sculptures that looked like nothing and then made up what we thought they looked like...crazy imagination stuff. 

Competitions galore with the pink bouncy balls.  We tried to see who could do the most bounces, then who could do the most bounces without moving their feet, then who could bounce back and forth between hands without missing a catch, then we tried to beat a brick wall by seeing how  many times we could bounce the balls off the brick wall to each other.  Good times.

It was a great date!

We have a little theme every week to keep it fresh.  This week was a date for under $10.  Our next date is sports and fitness.

So get out, get a babysitter, and go have some fun together.

And don't forget the Big League Chew and make sure to stick that  folded up package of gum in your back pocket for full-kid-fun-effect.

And kiss...a lot.

dating. LOVE.

I want to do it myself.

I'm sure you've heard this 100 (million) times, too...

Grace had planned out for a long time what dress she was going to wear the day of her party.  The whole time I'm thinking she's planning for her princess dress.  I'm thinking, "How hard can that be?" 

The day before her party, I found out she had a specific plan to wear her favorite skirt/jean/shirt combo when she woke up.  She would be wearing that "party dress" (her words) in the morning.  When the party was going to start she would change into her princess dress.

The picture posted above is her version of being ready for her Strawberry Shortcake princess flowers and butterflies party.  I didn't know princesses wore pioneer bonnets, but apparently this one does.  When she came down sporting this outfit I said to her, "I thought you were wearing your princess crown."  She said. "Nope."  And acted like this outfit was nothing short of fantastic and who wouldn't wear this fantabulous outfit to their 5 year old birthday party?

So.  That's what she wore.  No cajoling from me.  It was her party.  Her outfit.  Her plan.  And I wasn't getting in the way of fashion.

This morning my sweet little missies and I made a ginormous breakfast for ourselves while the boys were away on a camping trip. 

Miriam made the french toast from beginning to end, Emma made the bacon and got the strawberries ready for our yummy Strawberry and Whipped Cream French Toast, and Grace made the scrambled eggs with cheese...yes, all by herself...at the stove. (yes, I was a little nervous)

So as we're all working in the kitchen Miriam says, "These are the best looking French toasts I have ever seen."  Grace says, "These eggs are going to be soooo GOOD!"

Once we sat down to breakfast, Emma said, "This bacon is awesome."  And proceeded to eat most of it before anyone else even got to have any.  Grace said, "These eggs are sooo yummy!"  And Miriam said, "This is the best french toast I have ever had in my whole life!!"

I was talking to a friend about the idea of letting your kids do grown up things themselves.

Some of the things that my kids do on their own (including my just turned 5 year old):

Sweep the floor.

Set the table for dinner.

Help make dinner.

Pick out their own clothes to wear.

Clean the bathroom toliets.

Dust the house.

Vacuum.

Clean up after themselves.

Make brownies.

Plant a garden.

Make their own lunch.

Get their own snack.

Decorate their room.

Divide the laundry.

Go out to the woods together.

Plan their own parties.

Make invitations.

Write thank you notes.

Create art projects.

Plan summer projects and field trips.

Make their beds.

Make powerpoint presentations on the computer.

Okay...so this list is sounding like I had kids so they could do all my dirty work.  Maybe I did.  Don't judge me. :)

Really, though...I think kids derive a great deal of confidence from doing grown up things, learning how to do something that is hard, and being proud of the ability to accomplish something that some one older than them can do.  I believe in empowering my kids, giving them choices, letting them facing the consequences, allowing them to express themselves creatively, and giving them opportunities to gain the confidence that they can do hard things.

I also want my kids to understand that in a family everyone has a responsibility to make our home and family a safe, fun, clean, loving, and happy place. 

So even though I would love to tell my kids what to wear every day...(because, let's face it, they'd look a darn lot more put together and cuter if I chose their outfits).  I really do let them go to school in their favorite-shirt-that-I-had-to-sneak-into-their-room-and-put-in-the-wash-after-they-went-to-sleep-before-they-wake-up-in-the-morning-and-put-it-on-again or the skirt-and-jeans-combo (yes, I did write sKirt)  that's become Gracie's signature look. 

Even though some of their outfits are a little off the wall or don't match...I love those crazy outfits!  I love them mostly because I know it's my kids expressing themselves, showing their independence, and feeling good in what they're wearing.  I also love it because I think they look like kids should look...like they picked out their own clothes.  Some of my favorite pictures are the ones that show my kids in crazy outfits that they came up with...and yes, they are in a public place...yes, where the world can see that, yes, their mother let them out of the house looking like that...(and ohmiheck!  there is their mom!  what was she thinking?!)

I love that I can walk around my house and see one child laying on the couch completely engrossed in a book they've chosen from the shelf, 2 others kids up at the art table creating some fascinating project, and another outside with friends trying to figure out how to finish a teepee.  All of these things their own ideas.

I can't say I've never had a child come to me and say those two dreaded words...."I'm bored."  (To which I usually reply, "That's you're own fault.")

When my kids ask if they can help with something my answer is usually, "Yes."

I want them to hear that phrase a lot:  "Yes, you can."

Yes, you can choose your life.  Yes, you can make decisions.  Yes, you can see the consequences.  Yes, you can learn to do something difficult. 

Yes, you can be you.

empowered. LIFE.

every night.

As many of you know I read to my kids every night.  Lately, we've been reading Enna Burning.  It's a wonderful book about friendship and doing difficult things and understanding who you are...and it's just a great read!  It's well written and the characters are compelling.  Every night when it's time to stop reading the kids say, NO!! Don't stop yet.  Keep reading!

Tonight we just read page 245...the best page in Enna Burning so far!

I love it.  Every book I've read by Shannon Hale I've loved.  The heroines are sweet and beautiful and powerful and compassionate and they are perfect for young girls...and for older girls...like me.

You should definitely check it out...and tell me what you think.

note:  The above cover is the one we have.  I've noticed that the book now has a new cover and the audio version is now the old book cover...just so you know, they are the same book...

good. LIFE.

workflow board.

I'm a very visual person when it comes to knowing and remembering what I need to do.  If I can't see it...I'll forget about it.

For a long time when I was first in business I tried to keep track of things in my head or random papers here and there.  I would make lists of what needed to be done (which I still do...just a little more organized about it now...that should be another LOVE. LIFE. TIP.)  The lists were good but I needed to be able to see at a glance what was going on.

The thing about this whole idea was that it couldn't look too corporate for my studio or for my taste.  I want it to look cool, fit my colors, and look nice in my studio.  I tried white boards and a bunch of other things and they were just never what I really loved.  When I hired a team I also knew I wanted to be able to have them know who they were talking to on the phone.  That meant pictures of my clients needed to be part of the workflow board also.  We also wanted to see at a glance when their event or wedding was and their names.

I also wanted to have it be something that was fun to work with.  Sometimes lists or long projects seem so intimidating or you dread doing them.  I didn't want my board to have that kind of a feel to it.  I wanted it to look like everything on the board was FUN to do.

So, I didn't want much, did I?! :)

So these were the specifications for my workflow board:

It had to look good in my studio

I needed to be able to see quickly where every client was at in the process

Pictures of my clients needed to be on the board

The client info about their event and their names needed to be seen at a glance

It had to be functional enough for me to actually use it

It had to have a fun feel to it

I wanted to enjoy using it and looking at it

It had to be easy to work with

It had to look good

did I mention...it had to look good?

I ended up making one myself because I couldn't find what I really wanted in the market or industry.  So...this is a one of kind that I made by making a trip to the craft store, finding papers that I loved, and printing images of my clients with their info.  I love the way it looks and it keeps me organized. 

If this seems like a project that you don't want to jump into, my friend Millie is creating a workflow board that you can put your logo on.  Very cool.

This is what I came up with...

organized. LIFE.

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best and worst.

Dinner time is another favorite time of day for me.  I love the chance to eat good food, hear all of the buzz about the day, and talk about the best and worst.

A year or so ago I started asking the kids to tell what their best and worst was for the day when we were sitting at dinner.  Now, it's become a normal part of dinner.  It's been great, especially doing having this be our little family ritual through our move across the country.  It's given the kids a chance to tell us how things really are, what is happening at school, and what they like in their lives.  It's been so helpful for being able to keep tabs on how they are really feeling about things.

Some days everyone has had a really great day and no one can even think of a 'worst' for the day.  Other days some people can't think of a 'best' for the day.

Some worsts:

I really miss Utah

We didn't get to go outside for recess today because it was raining

I spent too much time on the computer

I didn't get to sit with Emma today at lunch

Some bests:

I got the winning touchdown today when we played football at recess

I was the leader today at preschool

I got everything done today that I wanted to get done

I had 20 people in class today

Working in the yard together

Our new trails we made in the yard

Playing in the fort we made in the woods

Shopping for Emmett's birthday

I sold more kits today

I talked to a great bride about her wedding in Florida

Reading books with mom on the couch

Going to Asheville with Dad

Going on a date with Mike

Going on a walk with Grace

Most everything is really simple...but they make up the fabric of our lives...and that's what I love about it!

I've decided to start keeping a little book that has our bests and worsts in it so that we can have a little record to look at years from now.

If you're not doing best and worst or not having dinner together...both are totally worth giving a try!

best. LIFE.

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