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Clarity and Courage

by Storey Wilkins

DISCLAIMER: 

Just because I know this stuff doesn’t mean I live it every day.  Life is about learning as you go.  SW

It shouldn’t be this way...but I can count the number of times on one hand when I have possessed great and equal amounts of both clarity and courage.  Interestingly, each time I have experienced this powerful intersection, great change has occurred in my life (including starting my photography business). 

So why so few occurrences?  Because like most working women, I completely overwork myself – I have six balls in the air at once – I try to be a supermom – and I don’t do what most men do (such as allocating time for rest and relaxation and taking a proper lunch break).

Think of the last time you made a really great change in your life…could it be that you had a moment of clarity where you just knew what you had to do?  Could it also be that you found the courage to do it even if it was a difficult change?

This article is about celebrating our “Moments of Clarity.”  It’s also about finding courage to ACT.  It’s really about that rare and treasured intersection where clarity meets courage and beautiful, positive or necessary things happen.    

Clarity

Think back to the year you decided to become a photographer.  What was happening when you figured it out, when you realized this was your calling?  The greatest moment of clarity I have ever experienced was on the day Margaret, my first born, lay in my arms for the first time.  I knew instantly that my greatest and most wonderful lifetime task had begun, and would never end.  

My professional photography career path is probably similar to yours.  I was in my thirties and home with Margaret, and then Ava (both under two), wondering if I could ever return to the corporate world, when I saw the light…literally.  Clarity, and my heart, told me I wanted to be a stay at home mom - and a photographer.  So, I followed my heart. 

Seven years ago Storey Wilkins Photography was born, baby #3 if you will.  Like my kids’ toys, the business expanded to consume an entire floor of my house with space for staff and a seemingly endless array of printers, computers, and photographic gadgets (thankfully not strewn on the floor). 

For years I had been photographing my loved ones just for fun.  When my friend Kate asked me to photograph her wedding day, I experienced a remarkable moment of clarity.  It was as though my path was clear.  I remember the fear that set in realizing the responsibility I had just accepted.  I spent months reading books, taking photography classes, and practicing relentlessly. 

They say that photographers either LOVE or HATE photographing weddings, and that you will know right away in which camp you belong.  That first wedding was an adrenaline rush I won’t forget.  It was a cottage wedding and I remember going barefoot in the lake to cover the ceremony, and climbing the roof to get one big group shot.  I found myself thinking, this is SO cool!!!!

Now?  I find myself with a thriving wedding and family portrait business, with fabulous clients, dealing with wonderful people all along the way, and enjoying professional recognition such as recently being named one of Canada’s Top 10 Wedding photographers.  Above it all, Margaret and Ava think I am a great mom and LOVE me to bits - as I do them.  We have ALL grown up.

Courage

So…what did you have to do to make it all happen?  Did you have to move roadblocks?  Climb mountains?   Generally accomplish the impossible?  Did the first year prove so difficult that you almost gave up?  Or, did you find the courage to persevere and succeed? Did you have to move forward in spite of a lack of support or understanding from those close to you?  Did you take more than one job despite your subconscious screaming that you shouldn’t, because you knew from the start they were not a good fit?   Have you referred to yourself as a ’PJ’ photographer because you lacked the courage to ‘work a room’ to create portraits? 

If so, welcome.  I have been there.

Just imagine the great things that can still happen when we have a major moment of clarity, and a ton of courage to go along with it.  Even better, wouldn’t it be fantastic if we could find a way to have a little clarity and a little courage, each and every day?  It might be something as small as returning that difficult phone call, turning down a commission that just doesn’t feel right, or addressing a production problem with a staff member or supplier that you know could create tension.

If so, welcome.  I have been there.

Clarity and courage are HUGE words.  Start with the smallest problem you have.  Gain courage.  Build strength.  Tackle another one.  Build more strength.  Before you know it, you are dealing with problems instead of collecting them.

Advice going forward:

Decide your path and don’t be frightened. Remember that excitement and fear are very close emotions. 

Don’t be lazy and expect the glory to come to you easily without putting in the effort.  To photograph a wedding beautifully is exceptionally hard work.  Don’t mind the work – Treasure it! 

Embrace the incredible effort required to get better at what you do every year (plenty of camera time, reading books AND instruction manuals, attending workshops and conventions, and entering professional print competitions). 

During seminars, take REAL notes like you never did in high school, don’t just blindly buy the DVD (don’t “drink the CoolAid”), and don’t expect it to come quickly or easily.  Everything good requires an effort.

I don’t care if you don’t relate to the work being showcased in your local professional association, join the group and participate regularly. You will learn about the “life” of professional photography, avoid some common pitfalls, and, most importantly, you will make some lifelong friends along the way.

Realize that every photographer, no matter how famous or how lauded, has had to start at the bottom.  It always looks daunting from down below.  Surprisingly the view often never changes because there will always be new challenges and new technology to master.

To finish:

Rather than six balls in the air (as I mentioned at the start), I wish I had the “balls” of a 60 year old woman, now, in my 40’s.  Experienced women know what they want and are not afraid to ask for it.  They have the clarity to know what they want - AND the courage to ask for it. 

So why wait until you’re 60?  Let’s see if can’t just do it NOW…shall we?

**For inspiration, see the following resource:

 Elliott, Timothy  Clarity and Courage:  Life as an Improvised Journey, Toronto:  Elliott Resource Services, 2006

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